Whoever said “mo’ money, mo’ problems” was obviously crazy or didn’t know where to shop. You know too well the struggle of having to budget your broke ass, all for the glory of shiny new things. You were born with good taste, but without the funds to support it. Oh, cruel world.
#1. Your budgeting techniques are insane.
“If I sustain myself with nothing but crackers and cheese this week, I’ll have those YSL leather pumps by the end of the month!”
#2. You shudder at the thought of credit card deadlines.
In the process of a purchase, you make the cash register your personal shrine, praying to higher powers up above that ‘if this goes through, I promise I won’t spend for another week, please, please, please!’
#3. Based on your style, people just assume you’re rich.
When in fact, you’re BROKE AF. When fairy godmothers came to bless you with impeccable taste, they forgot to throw in the bottomless bank account.
#4. You convince yourself it’s okay to splurge on something limited edition.
Because it’s limited edition.
#5. You don’t understand how others of higher wealth could have such bad taste.
You’re one Alexander Wang handbag away from going up to a rich person and yelling out ‘you’re not spending your money right, give it to me!!’
#6. Your ultimate goal is to work anywhere high-fashion adjacent.
Or you’ve seriously contemplated applying for a job at Bergdorf’s.
#7. Just thinking about Bergdorf’s makes you all warm inside.
It’s the closest heaven you’ve got. Admit it.
#8. You’ve made irrational and impulsive decisions at a sale.
“If I’m going to debtor’s hell, I might as well go in a pair of Manolo Blahnik’s.”
#9. You have to constantly defend yourself when someone calls you a shopaholic.
Shopaholics like shopping for anything, all the time, period. You like shopping for pretty and expensive things. Big difference.
#10. You feel that seeing a really good knock-off is a test from the high-fashion gods.
You believe giving in to buying a fake anything is a sure fire way into fashion damnation.
#11. You take extra jobs for the sole purpose of being able to afford your lifestyle.
And that’s nothing to be ashamed of. Go get dat money, gurl.
#12. You know that having expensive taste isn’t limited to material things.
Boxed mac and cheese just doesn’t cut it anymore because damn you, black truffle macaroni and cheese!
#13. You defend your taste in expensive brands by bringing up quality issues.
One good J Crew tee is worth all the department store shirts in the world.
#14. You wonder if you’ll ever outgrow it.
And then you laugh, and promise yourself that you’d never be caught dead in a sweater from Target, even at the age of 60.