Anyone in a relationship may want to watch for five warning signs that can point to a partnership heading toward its breaking point.
Oregon-based therapist Jeff Guenther has said there are a few recurring patterns that regularly show up when couples are nearing the end — problems that can be extremely difficult to come back from.
Relationships aren’t always smooth, and plenty of bumps can be handled when both people tackle them head-on with patience and maturity.
But some patterns tend to keep returning for a reason, and they can be hard to reverse once they become the norm.
Guenther often shares his perspective on TikTok via @therapyjeff, and he’s outlined five themes that commonly signal a relationship is in real trouble.
“Over time, if you stop engaging in little acts of affection like compliments, flirting, touching, or spending quality time together, it’s as if you have become roommates merely crossing paths in the hallway,” the specialist said.
“This creates a significant gap, making it feel too daunting to mend things or perhaps, you have already moved on emotionally.”
Arguments are normal — but the issue, Guenther suggests, is when couples get stuck in a loop, rehashing the same conflict with no repair or progress.
The expert noted: “Frequent unresolved arguments where the same issues resurface without any resolution or repair, lead to deep-seated resentment, contempt, and emotional exhaustion.
“This means even minor disagreements trigger a sense of ‘here we go again,’ followed by shutdown and withdrawal.”
Another major sign on his list is what happens when two people begin heading in different directions over time, even if there’s no single dramatic event to blame.
“Number three, growing apart. Sometimes partners simply grow apart and it leads to unexpected shifts in the relationship.” Yeesh.
He also points to situations where one partner starts prioritizing independence in a way that the relationship can’t easily accommodate — something that can create distance quickly if it isn’t addressed.
“Occasionally, a partner craves freedom outside the relationship. This often isn’t about the partner’s inadequacy, but about a personal journey of self-discovery.
“That partner seeking independence might still love their significant other, but this need often leads to feelings of being trapped, creating a gap in the relationship that’s hard to bridge,” Guenther suggested.
Lastly, he says the most damaging scenario is when romantic or emotional focus shifts to someone outside the relationship, which can destroy trust and make rebuilding feel unrealistic.
“Developing feelings for someone outside the current relationship typically signals unmet emotional needs,” Guenther revealed. “It’s perceived as a significant betrayal and it erodes trust and breaks emotional connection.
“The redirection of affection for someone else renders the task of mending the original relationship extremely difficult, if not impossible.”