After Nikki Glaser openly shared that she ‘kind of likes’ the thought of her partner sleeping with other women, a sex and relationships expert has broken down what the fetish can involve — and why the increasingly discussed ‘hothusbanding’ kink appears to be on the rise.
In 2023, Glaser spoke on The Goop Podcast with Gwyneth Paltrow about her long-running, on-and-off relationship with TV producer Chris Convy, whom she has dated intermittently since 2013.
“I guess I’m just confident in like, I’m a pretty good person to date. When it comes to my relationship, I just don’t have jealousy over him getting close to other women,” the comedian said on the podcast.
She’d already touched on similar feelings the year before, telling Graham Bensinger in 2022 that she was into the idea of a partner at least considering being with other women.
“I want things that other people want. I wouldn’t mind if [he] had a little fling with someone else… Everyone has their own kinky thing. My thing is, I don’t mind that,” she said.
More recently, she expanded on her viewpoint in a conversation with Alex Cooper on the Call Her Daddy podcast earlier this week.
“In a relationship, I don’t really care if my boyfriend were to hook up,” the Golden Globes host explained.
“But that is not a two-way street. I’m not someone who likes to hook up when I’m in a relationship. I don’t really care about that. But I don’t care if someone else were to. In fact, I kind of like it.”
Glaser also said that discussions about a partner’s dating history — including exes and past encounters — can feel like part of the build-up for her.
“It would make me horny to think about him doing that with other girls,” the Trainwreck star confessed.
“So, I’d ask about all of his girlfriends or anyone he had hooked up with, all the details about it, and it would really be like a foreplay for me. I would get revved up talking about it.”
Following the headlines around Glaser’s remarks, Annabelle Knight, Lovehoney sex & relationship expert, offered a closer look at the ‘hot husband’ fetish and how it’s typically understood.
“A ‘hot husband’ fetish, or ‘hothusbanding’, is a relatively new term that is the counterpart to ‘hotwife’,” Knight explained.
“This fetish is essentially the sexual gratification of your (in this case, male) partner having consensual sex with other people. ‘Hothusbandig’ would refer to the act of the husband (or male partner) having consensual sex with other people, while ‘hot husband fetish’ would refer specifically to the feelings it evokes in the partner of the ‘hot husband’.”
Knight also addressed why someone might find their partner’s sexual experiences with others arousing.
“Part of the enjoyment of letting their husband sleep with other men could come from a feeling of ‘erotic surrender’, and a voluntary submissiveness that plays into domination fantasies.”
She added that, for some couples, the appeal can also be linked to validation and exclusivity — enjoying the fact that other people desire your partner, even though the relationship remains primary.
“Another reason could be the ‘possessive’ or ‘prize’ element – essentially gaining gratification from the sexual appeal that others have in your husband or chosen partner, where ultimately, he comes back to you in the end.”
Knight noted that dynamics sometimes overlap with interests seen in cuckolding or cuckqueaning, where watching, taboo, or humiliation themes can be part of what excites participants, and these can also feed into ‘hothusbanding’ for certain people.
As the topic circulates more widely after Glaser’s comments, Knight suggested that it remains a niche interest overall — even as relationship structures outside monogamy gain visibility.
“Ethical nonmonogamy is certainly becoming more popular and present in society, but it is still not near the most common form of relationship, so therefore we can say that the fetish itself is not overly common,” she said.
“There may be elements of the ‘hot husband’ fetish that are more common, without the physical element of having sex with others; for example, a partner might take pride or feel some form of reward in their husband or male partner being coveted by others, which you could argue is a form of this fetish.”
She also pointed to the broader conversation around ethical nonmonogamy, saying interest may be growing, but many people still view it through misconceptions.
She added: “Ultimately, though, if you are confident and secure in an open relationship, then they are every bit as valid as a ‘typical’ nuclear relationship.”
Finally, Knight shared guidance for couples who are curious about exploring this kink, emphasising that it should be approached with clarity and care.
“The common theme in any fetish concerns boundaries, consent, and communication. Any action partaken by either the ‘hothusband’ or the ‘cuckquean’ should be communicated ahead of time, be consensual, and be within boundaries that you have set,” Knight said.
“It might be that you are happy for your husband or male partner to have sex with anyone they want, or it might be that you have to sign off on it – there is no wrong or right way to go about it, but as long as you stay within the boundaries you have set for yourself, you can’t go too far wrong.
“If either partner wants it to stop at any time, then you should respect that, as consent can always be withdrawn.”