Jay, the TikTok creator known as lucidbluejay, has revealed that day 38 of his daily walking challenge was his hardest yet after online backlash sent him spiraling.
The 550lb man, now down to 475lb on day 80, said that the milestone nearly broke him when a video of his journey hit 11.7 million views and drew a wave of criticism. “They shamed me for the meals I was eating and how I looked, because one of my videos went viral at 11.7 million views,” he admitted.
Jay explained that the negative attention triggered old coping mechanisms he had relied on for decades. “I used to binge eat to suppress my emotions when I was overwhelmed. When I would binge eat, it was sort of like an automatic mode where I didn’t even look at what I was eating,” he said. “I would chase the dopamine feeling by eating copious amounts of food. But at one point in my life, the dopamine hit just stopped.”
That cycle of emotional eating had trapped him since childhood. Having been overweight since he was six years old, Jay found himself stuck in patterns where nothing changed year after year. Tying his shoes became what he described as a “monumental task,” leaving him breathless and forcing him to sit and rest constantly.
The viral attention on day 38 threatened to pull him back into that loop. “Before I struggled to get to the end of my driveway,” he noted, a stark contrast to his current routine of 1.5 miles walked six days a week with one rest day.
Jay pushed through by reclaiming control of his own narrative. He noted that day 38 became “extremely difficult” after he “allowed other people to dictate” how he felt — a realization that helped him refocus on why he started.
His regimen has since expanded beyond walking. Jay has introduced weight training alongside his daily miles, and he plans to increase his distance as his fitness improves. The structure gives him measurable progress without fixating on a number.
“The ultimate goal,” he shared, “Is to live a long and happy life for myself and for my family,” He added: “There is no scale number I’m trying to hit, no specific look. Just becoming the best version of myself that I needed when I as a kid.”
The physical changes have already reshaped his daily experience. “I have A LOT more energy throughout my day because I weigh much less than when I began my journey,” he said. “I can tie my shoes without getting out of breath now, which was a monumental task. I used to have to sit and rest constantly because I was so out of shape. My mental fortitude is stronger; I found my confidence, and I believe in myself a lot more.”
Jay’s breakthrough moment came when he stopped letting outside voices override his internal drive. Where he once chased dopamine through food, he now finds it in consistency and self-respect. The man who could barely reach the end of his driveway now covers over a mile daily, building toward a future he once could not imagine.