A former ‘trad wife’ has opened up about the darker aspects of this lifestyle following the end of her decade-long marriage.
The ‘trad wife’ lifestyle is one rooted in conservative values, often linked to conservative Christianity. In this setup, a married woman remains at home, focusing on ‘traditional’ roles such as cooking, cleaning, and child-rearing.
In such relationships, the woman handles domestic duties while the husband is the family’s sole breadwinner. The motivations for adopting the ‘trad wife’ lifestyle can differ from person to person.
Enitza Templeton tied the knot with her husband in 2009, long before the ‘trad wife’ trend gained popularity on social media platforms like TikTok.
For 10 years, she adhered to traditional gender roles, her life revolving around “just cooking meals, taking care of kids and tending to everybody else’s needs.”
“That was the whole day,” she told People, but she soon began to question her situation.
Reflecting on the moment she realized she needed to leave, Templeton said: “I remember watching TV, folding the towels thinking, ‘I wish anybody could help me out of this. If I had the money, if I had the means, if I had some way, I would not be married. I hate this.’
“I don’t want my daughters to be in a marriage like this.”
Templeton knew that if she wanted her daughters to lead independent lives, she needed to set a positive example. “From that moment on, I started to make more and more changes in my life until I finally left,” she added.
@emergingmotherhood Best decision of my life. #tradwife #singlemomof4 #singlemombychoice
Templeton, a mother of four – three daughters and a son – faced additional challenges as her second daughter was born with Down syndrome and a heart defect. Despite these difficulties, the trad wife lifestyle pushed her to continue having more children.
“I was having a baby that was having open heart surgery, but I was still pregnant with another one. And then pregnant with another one, and another open heart surgery,” she said.
“And then trying to homeschool one of them and trying to keep this one alive with her oxygen and then pregnant with the next one.”
Despite her struggles, Templeton maintained appearances, keeping her home in order and wearing makeup and dresses.
Seeing the lifestyle gain traction on social media has been tough for Templeton, who admits she ‘absolutely’ would have participated if it had been available during her marriage.
Nevertheless, she hopes that this revelation will shed light on the reality behind the ‘trad wife’ lifestyle.
She remarked, “I’m glad that people are seeing it for what it is,” adding, “I see their deep, deep, deep desire to validate the lifestyle and to be like, ‘Look at me. I’m so perfect and beautiful, and I do all these things amazingly.’
“It’s super sad. It’s also a little bit disingenuous. I know what it’s like. You’re not showing the full picture.
“There is a lot of ugliness behind the scenes.”
“You can never reach perfection in the tradwife life,” Templeton continued. “You just keep going deeper and deeper down rabbit holes. I feel like it’s just to keep you busy and keep your wheels spinning.”