More couples are beginning to challenge traditional perceptions of intimacy by embracing a unique trend that emphasizes deeper connection over performance. This approach, known as Karezza, is gaining traction for its unexpected emotional and physical benefits.
Despite its unfamiliar name, Karezza is not a new concept. Its origins trace back over a century, but it is seeing a resurgence as discussions about mindfulness, mental health, and genuine connection become more prevalent.
The term ‘Karezza’ (pronounced ka-RET-za) comes from the Italian word ‘carezza’, which means ‘caress’. This is a gentle, affectionate form of sexual intercourse that prioritizes relaxation, tenderness, and love rather than climax.
Practitioners aim to achieve a tranquil unity with their partners, which they believe enhances both physical and emotional intimacy.
The practice dates back to 1844, originating with John Humphrey Noyes who introduced an idea called ‘Male Continence’, a way to achieve intimacy without reaching orgasm. Later, the term ‘Karezza’ was popularized by American physician Alice B. Stockham, and further explored in J. William Lloyd’s 1931 book, The Karezza Method. Lloyd described it as a technique to maintain ‘strong sexual energy’ and enhance the bond between partners.
Lloyd also suggested it could alleviate certain physical conditions, such as painful menstruation and prostatitis, though there is no scientific backing for these health claims. However, Karezza-style intimacy has been shown to increase oxytocin levels, the ‘love hormone’, which fosters feelings of warmth, trust, and emotional security.
Karezza differs from traditional sexual encounters as its aim isn’t to pursue passion or orgasm. It centers on connection through small, meaningful actions like maintaining eye contact, gentle touching, synchronized breathing, and shared stillness. Relaxed positions, such as lying side by side, are common.
According to Lloyd, the success of Karezza lies in partners experiencing a unifying bond instead of the release typical of orgasm. Mastering this approach requires patience and open communication, especially for those used to goal-focused intimacy. Experts suggest trying the method for at least three weeks to observe its impact on emotional well-being and relationship fulfillment.
For many couples, Karezza offers a path to reconnect on a profound level, helping to reduce anxiety and shift focus from performance to presence.