You know what I’m talking about: Googling ‘how to flirt’, getting text messages idiot-proofed by a trusted friend before hitting the ‘send’ button, observing mating behaviour in clubs and bars… We are the people who just aren’t good at flirting, but desperately want to be.
Much like charisma and *cringe* ‘swag’, it seems that flirting can’t be faked — you either have it or you don’t.
So what happens when your parents forget to pass on the flirting gene? A series of painful, awkward events, that’s what.
#1. You say something unintentionally creepy.
It always sounds so much better in your head…
#2. You get mistaken for being somewhat psychotic.
You wink like you’re about to have a seizure or you make too much eye contact. Sometimes you even forget about this thing called personal space.
#3. When really, you’re just awkward.
It’s not your fault, you were just born that way.
#4. You don’t know how to respond to simple questions…
You either say too much or not enough.
#5. …And when you do get the conversation going, you soon manage to mess things up in the most innocent ways imaginable.
Sometimes we look at other ‘normal’ people interacting and weep inside with despair.
#6. You read Cosmo magazine for flirting tips at one point.
Surprise, surprise. That didn’t help either.
#7. You don’t know when someone is flirting with you.
Your ‘flirt radar’ is perpetually off and is as bad as your ability to flirt.
#8. You try to be funny by using pick-up lines and jokes.
No.
#9. You haven’t even started flirting yet and your friends are already shaking their heads.
As much as they love you and all your quirks, they can’t help but feel a little bit sorry for you and whoever is on the receiving end of your psycho-like advances.
But there is good news on the horizon guys and gals. Because for every wicked wooer and tempting tease, there is a failure of a flirt waiting to sweep you off your feet. So have no shame in being yourself, even if you’re a little bit weird. Being genuine and sincere has its own endearing charm that will help you go further than any pick-up line ever will.