A dating expert has outlined six primary reasons she believes women may cheat on their partners, some of which might be unexpected.
Infidelity, defined as being unfaithful to a spouse, partner, or exclusive sexual partner, can have devastating consequences for both individuals involved.
Cheaters may experience intense guilt and remorse, while their partners may suffer from low self-esteem and a significant loss of trust.
Relationship expert Tracey Cox notes that women who cheat often have complex motivations, which she detailed in The Daily Mail, highlighting six core reasons that might surprise you.
These reasons include feeling neglected by an emotionally distant partner, wanting to escape responsibilities, and seeking sexual satisfaction.
Emotional neglect occurs when a partner consistently fails to notice or respond to their significant other’s feelings, according to Roubicek & Thacker Counseling.
This neglect can stem from factors such as hectic lifestyles, societal expectations, or focusing on career over relationships.
Emotional neglect is hard to pinpoint since it involves a partner doing “nothing wrong,” but signs include procrastination, loneliness, and lack of clarity in the relationship.
Cox suggests that women experiencing emotional disconnection are more likely to seek other partners.
She emphasizes the importance of maintaining a strong emotional bond with your partner for a happy life.
If emotional neglect is an issue, couples therapy might help address the root cause.
For those who have been wronged, there may be a desire to retaliate against a cheating partner, according to Cox.
“It’s not just about evening the score: it’s about reclaiming a sense of agency and dignity in a relationship where we feel wronged,” she explained.
“It might not be the most sensible course of action but the urge to hurt our partner the same way we’ve been hurt, is hard to resist.”
This view is supported by a 2017 study from Kayla Knopp in the Archives of Sexual Behavior.
The study, titled ‘Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater? Serial Infidelity Across Subsequent Relationships,’ found that individuals who have cheated are three times more likely to do so again.
“Regardless of whether you are the perpetrator of the infidelity or whether your partner was, those experiences are substantially more likely to repeat themselves,” Knopp states, according to the University of Denver.
“However, there are lots of people who break those patterns. I don’t want to suggest that it’s someone’s fault that someone is cheating on them, but I think it’s important to acknowledge that we all play a role in our relationships.”
A power imbalance, whether in terms of money, status, or age, can strain relationships, Cox notes.
Women who feel subordinate may seek control by engaging in affairs.
“In relationships marked by emotional or psychological imbalances, having an affair is a way of reclaiming a sense of control,” she wrote.
“It’s particularly common when a partner is overly dominant or controlling. If you’re too scared to confront directly, doing something sneaky behind their back to make yourself feel better is the next best thing.”
Marriage and family therapist Emily Heard advises addressing power dynamics directly.
“Name your vulnerability, and trust your partner cares enough about you to honor it. If you know your partner has a trauma history from a previous relationship, help them to feel supported,” she told Psych Central.
“If you feel that shame is arising around your appearance and body image, be vulnerable and honest with your partner about it. Trust that they love you and will not use it against you.”
According to a study from the National Institutes of Health, 15.2-50.4 percent of women are dissatisfied with their sexual experiences.
Cox claims this dissatisfaction drives many women to seek fulfillment outside their relationships.
“If you’re not getting good and regular sex at home, you’re more likely to get it elsewhere,” she stated.
“Sex might be fourth on the list of motivators for women in the study but we’re still susceptible to being seduced if sex with our partner is boring and dull.”
Failing to carve out personal time can also strain monogamous relationships, Cox adds.
Juggling chores, work, parenting, social life, and exercise can leave little time for personal space.
While some might take a spa day, others might secretly meet with a lover.
“The constant stress of juggling career, motherhood, work, and other responsibilities leave many women feeling unappreciated and overwhelmed,” she writes.
“‘It’s something that’s just for me,’ is a statement therapists hear a lot from women forced to justify why they stepped outside their marriage.”
Marriage is a dream for many, with over two million women getting married in 2022, according to Bowling Green State University.
But after decades, some may find the spark with their partner has faded, leading them to cheat, suggests Cox.
“Nearly eight per cent of women said they’d cheated simply because they were bored; another five per cent said they did it because they wanted novelty,” she noted.
“Monogamy might offer security and companionship but humans desensitise rapidly and even in good relationships there are periods where life seems, well, monotonous.”
To combat boredom in a relationship, activities like attending sports clubs, embracing change, or traveling together can offer alternatives to infidelity.