A man has shared details about how many marriages he has impacted through his involvement in extramarital affairs over two decades.
While most people desire harmonious relationships, Psychology Today suggests that up to 20% of individuals engage in infidelity. The signs of cheating, such as secretive bank transactions or mysterious contacts, are not always apparent and can easily go unnoticed. Recently, an anonymous man who has been aiding in infidelity for 20 years has decided to share his experiences.
He turned to Reddit for an Ask Me Anything session, where he disclosed his ‘divorce rate’ and discussed the unexpected reactions from husbands upon discovering the infidelity.
The man clarified that his post was not intended to boast and mentioned that he has kept his lifestyle hidden, even from his family.
He began engaging in affairs with the wives of affluent businessmen at the age of 19 in 2003 while working at a golf club.
A social media user inquired if he had ever been caught by a spouse or if he feared for his safety. Surprisingly, the number of confrontations was minimal.
He responded, “In just over 20 years of doing this, I can only recall five women ever actually getting caught. Out of those five, only two ended up divorced. The rest stayed married and surprisingly things did not change much.”
He elaborated on the dynamics of these marriages: “The reality is that in these circles the marriages are often more about money, image, and social positioning than love or exclusivity. A lot of people on the outside do not understand that dynamic.”
He further explained how husbands typically react when they find out about the infidelity.
He noted that it’s a ‘rare’ event but explained that husbands usually respond in one of two ways. “Either he is quietly fine with it from the start, or he is angry at first but eventually comes to terms with it.”
“The reason is simple. Divorce for these men is financially devastating. If she has been with him long enough, she could take half or more of his wealth plus ongoing support. Many of them would rather swallow their pride than lose hundreds of millions.”
In some instances, he revealed that husbands were not only aware of the affairs but were ‘directly involved.’
“More times than I can count, I have been with a woman while her husband watched. Sometimes it is a control thing for him, sometimes it is just voyeurism, and other times it is a mutual kink they have kept private for years,” he explained.
“It is not as uncommon as people think, especially when you are dealing with couples in extreme wealth who are used to getting whatever they want.”
Regarding his own safety, the companion mentioned that he has ‘never’ encountered violent husbands, though he has had to make quick exits when some returned home earlier than expected.
“You learn early on to be careful to only move in situations that are controlled and to trust the discretion of the women you are seeing,” he said. “For the most part, they are the ones making sure everything stays quiet.”
It seems there are always more layers to unravel in the world of secretive relationships.