#1.
BATMAN: I got you flowers
CATWOMAN: Put them in this vase
BATMAN: Ok
CATWOMAN: *pushes vase off counter while maintaining eye contact*— Floyd (@dafloydsta) September 8, 2015
#2.
I had every intention of doing laundry but my cat seriously bullied me into cuddling with her. Who owns who?
— Blake (@ablakekennedy) September 18, 2016
#3.
*on phone* Sure I can come over! Let me–
Cat curled up on my lap: *makes throat slice gesture with claw*
No nvm, I'm just going to stay in
— Blind Chow (@BlindChow) December 28, 2014
#4.
Cat just chilling in Brockley Sainsbury's. Security tried to remove him. He sauntered straight back in. pic.twitter.com/MotEBFuzKr
— Jenny Stevens (@jenny_stevens) November 11, 2015
#5.
Me: *Sobbing* One minute he loves me and the next he wants nothing to do me!
Therapist: That's pretty typical cat behavior….
— emmy (@PetiteRainCity) January 24, 2015
#6.
Search History:
Cat armor
Buy armor for cats
Cat jousting tournaments
How to stop armored cats
Cat army how to stop
national guard phone #— said Drumpf at the restaurant & everybody clapped (@AbrasiveGhost) April 26, 2015
#7.
https://twitter.com/buhsbaby_baby/status/607399837814910976
#8.
For my cat's birthday I'm covering my coffee table with change, bottle caps, pens & gum wrappers so he can just knock it all onto the floor.
— summer goth 🦇 (@NicCageMatch) June 1, 2014
#9.
if my cat doesn't like you then i can't like you
sorry i don't make the rules— madison (@mtaucoin) June 5, 2016
#10.
Sometimes I wonder if I spoil the cat, seeing him with his iPad, in his yurt. pic.twitter.com/45ScY3Rloe
— Liz Buckley (@liz_buckley) January 21, 2015
#11.
https://twitter.com/KelgoreTrout/status/463418592579833856
#12.
https://twitter.com/InternetHippo/status/513830135838281728
#13.
Saying "Bless You" out loud when my cat sneezes makes me
— Amy Miller (@amymiller) November 16, 2015
#14.
https://twitter.com/ChaserStout/status/780458485398077441
#15.
Hey sorry I'm late, I had to hold my cat like a baby.
— Anne T. Donahue (@annetdonahue) November 10, 2015
#16.
Sorry I didn't pick up when you called, I was reenacting funny Broad City bits for my cat
— Mara Wilson (@MaraWilson) October 22, 2015
#17.
Me: *says we should not be slaves to the economy *
Also me: *bought a heart bowl and chicken sticks for my cat's birthday *— Crêpes ☭ (@nosdamae) August 3, 2016
#18.
https://twitter.com/kendrawcandraw/status/775731141202575360
