Paul Lucas, 37, has revealed how his wife Nicky helped shape the design of his reconstructed penis after he underwent a total penectomy for cancer.
The father, who appeared on ITV’s This Morning, first noticed something was wrong in July 2022 when he found himself “peeing at almost right angles.” Rather than seek medical help, he tried to ignore the problem and even bought medication online to avoid an embarrassing doctor’s visit.
“I just left it and left it, as you do, and tried to bury my head in the sand,” he explained on the program. “Then a growth started appearing.”
That growth continued to enlarge until Nicky insisted he see his GP. The appointment delivered devastating news: Paul would need complete removal of his penis. He received the penile cancer diagnosis with what he described as an unexpected sense of relief.
“It was almost the relief of knowing what it was, because at least it had a name and I could go right, it’s penile cancer, and yes it’s rare, but at least I know what it is and I could get my head around it and was in the system being referred,” he said. “Luckily it was diagnosed very quickly.”
The emotional weight of the situation hit hardest when Paul considered what the surgery might mean for his marriage. He feared losing both his sex life and his wife, offering Nicky the chance to leave him rather than face an uncertain future together.
“I felt overriding guilt,” he told the show. “Because we were quite young, and you always think that a man is what is in between your legs.”
Paul underwent a total penectomy — the complete removal of his penis — and later discovered the full extent of the procedure only after waking from surgery. “I didn’t actually know I had a full removal until 24 hours after my operation,” he said. “You know your body, and you know something isn’t quite right.”
Two additional lymph node operations followed to check whether the cancer had spread. The results came back clear, sparing him from further chemotherapy.
What came next was a series of reconstructive procedures Paul described as “sci-fi” in their complexity. Surgeons lifted several nerves from his arm and joined them to penile nerves, rebuilding both his phallus and urethra using skin and tissue from his forearm. Urology surgeon Wai Gin Lee confirmed that subsequent operations would be cosmetic, creating a glans, followed by insertion of an erectile device to restore intimate function.
Nicky played an unexpectedly hands-on role in her husband’s recovery. When surgeons discussed measurements for the reconstruction, she made her preferences known.
“When it came to the size measurements, we said why not go a bit bigger if possible, so that’s what we did,” she admitted on This Morning.
Paul embraced the unusual situation with characteristic humor. “I’ve got a designer phallus, and there’s not many wives can say that,” he said. He also noted one practical complication of the reconstruction: “The awkward nature of it is that because there’s no erectile tissue, it is always the size it is which can be a bit awkward.”
Penile cancer remains rare in the UK, typically developing under the foreskin in uncircumcised men or on the head of the penis. Symptoms include growths or sores, bleeding, foul-smelling rash, difficulty retracting the foreskin, color changes, swelling, and skin thickening. Treatment options range from chemotherapy creams and laser therapy for superficial cases to partial or total penectomy for invasive cancer that has grown deeper into the tissue.
Paul’s journey from ignoring a bent urine stream to facing a life-altering diagnosis, and ultimately to rebuilding both his body and his marriage, underscores how a partner’s intervention can change the trajectory of a health crisis. Nicky’s insistence that he see a doctor, and later her involvement in designing his reconstruction, transformed what could have been a story of isolation into one of collaboration.
The couple’s frank discussion on daytime television offered an unusually open look at a condition many men find too embarrassing to mention, let alone treat.
Paul’s next reconstructive phase will involve the insertion of an erectile device to complete the functional restoration of his reconstructed penis.