A Connecticut woman identified only as AM has filed a police report against her ex-boyfriend, alleging he turned a “smart house” gift into a months-long surveillance and harassment campaign.
AM, who works in fashion, luxury retail and beauty, told The Post she returned from a European trip to find the man she was dating had installed connected home technology throughout her residence. “He told me that I now have a smart house. I loved the idea of controlling lights and my stereo speakers remotely, through my phone,” she said. The divorced mother embraced the convenience, unaware the system would become a weapon after their breakup.
The stalking escalated across multiple fronts. “There were GPS trackers in my car,” AM recalled, describing widely available phone-connected devices typically marketed for luggage tracking. Inside her home, the ex remotely manipulated the environment she shared with her daughter: dimming lights at random moments and cutting the television while the child watched. “After the fact I realized that I was 100-percent targeted,” she said.
His reach extended far beyond physical spaces. The perpetrator had infiltrated her computer cloud, monitoring airline ticket purchases and email correspondence. “He employed multiple apps that I didn’t even know existed,” AM stated. “And he also had people following me in other countries.”
The sabotage targeted her professional livelihood directly. “He wanted to ruin my business. He got into my contacts and changed the names of people,” she explained. “A high-level creative director I deal with was put under the name of my babysitter. So, I think I am calling the babysitter, but I am actually calling a creative director.” She characterized the strategy as calculated psychological warfare: “He was trying to make me look crazy. My Rolodex is my currency, and my network is my net worth. He was trying to destroy all of that.”
Steven S. Stern, principal of Safe Harbor Advisory, confirmed to The Post that he had found invasive spyware on AM’s devices after she engaged his services. “The use of technology has become so sophisticated and almost impossible to defend against for a normal person,” Stern said. “They gain access to your phone, your computer, and they’re in your house.” AM has cycled through four iPhones attempting to escape the digital intrusion.
The ex-boyfriend’s intimidation included explicit threats, AM reported. “He knew he could paralyze me and take me down. He used to say, ‘Don’t f–k with me.’ I was scared. But I had no idea he could control me from afar.” Connecticut authorities confirmed the investigation remains ongoing; the man has not been arrested.
Rachel Talley, also a principal at Safe Harbor, contextualized how emerging technologies create novel vulnerabilities for stalking victims. “If they can get into your AI, they can see all the personal things you are putting in there,” Talley told The Post. “They can come at you psychologically as opposed to just physically or technologically.” Talley spoke from direct experience: “I had a stalker who broke into my home when I was sleeping and used my thumbprint [on her cell phone] to get into my accounts,” she recalled. “He would send messages to people I knew and then block them when they responded. It was traumatizing. Complete and utter chaos.”
AM’s case reflects a broader national pattern of technology-facilitated stalking. Aine O’Neill, an Irish TV host living in California, resorted to scrapping her vehicle entirely after discovering tracking tags planted by a stalker, ultimately fleeing Los Angeles to return to Ireland. In June, New Yorker Anthony Belford was arraigned on federal cyberstalking charges for allegedly posting AI-generated nude images of a woman while operating spoofed social media and email accounts; he has not entered a plea. Social media influencer Brett Michael Dadig, who called himself “God’s assassin,” pleaded guilty to stalking eleven women after reportedly using ChatGPT as a therapeutic sounding board, though the platform did not facilitate the crimes.
